The actual retail price.... (3)

I personally think we could have learned the "no speeding through Graubünden" lesson for much less than 260 CHF, but perhaps the rest of Switzerland is harder to convince. Nice guessing, Lillo. Pretty accurate for a non-driver. As a prize, why not pay it off for us! What's a few euros to a girl like you?

On the circumstances of said ticket....

When you are buying antiques, it's always very useful to learn the provenance of the piece you would like to purchase. So, while you are guessing on yesterday's tragic item, I am happy to oblige you its details.

The speeding ticket was admittedly well-deserved (in case we were not already thinking this, the letter accompanying the ticket delicately informed us of the existence of photographic proof to the contrary) but I feel the need to share the tragedy that had already befallen us this day. The police, I know, are not interested in explanations or apologies – how much do I still regret the "I'm sorry" that escaped from my mouth after a paternalistic tongue-lashing from a spiteful Evanston police officer convinced that my confused crosswalk violation revealed a latent desire to murder schoolchildren  – but friends (and antiquers) are much better at mercy and understanding than are self-important, authoritarian sadists. So I share the story with you.

About 1.5 hours out of Lugano toward Munich we faced a painful decision – continue on without passports or go home to get them and add an extra three hours to our trip. (Why on earth we would attempt a six hour driving trip in Europe without passports is another question I prefer not to think on.) After five minutes of slow and stilted driving, we came to terms with our stupidity and turned around. 

Is there anything worse than driving the same route three times in one afternoon? Is there anything more nauseating than eating chips and Carpe Diem carbonated medicinal tea drink all day?  Is there anything less conducive to driving the speed limit?

On the other hand, is there anything more satisfying than a pretzel, cheese, and a beer right before the beer garden closes? We made it to Munich in relatively good time; now we know why.

If you are, know, or happen to love a police officer, please know that I confine the majority of my hostility toward the Evanston police department and that no-good briber in Spain's police force (another good vindictive policeman story for another time). C'mon, I watch The Wire. I know all about what you guys do. I will forgive you for being mean to me since you deal with those yos (yo's?) on the corner all day.

Also, I am now thinking, I should not discount all of the good police officers that I knew personally as a grade schooler. Those guys always took time to come to school, gently scare us with statistics, listen to us being broken records... all while maintaining a friendly but official fatherly facade. Officer Friendly (apparently his real name) was a real peach. And that guy with a mustache and a less memorable name was always special to me as well. I never became a druggie, possibly because of them.

How much does it cost? (3)

I was thinking about retiring the dippy guessing game for a while, but then the mail came, bearing a special gift for us from the Graubünden Polizei:

(Check out how Swiss German uses one nifty word for "speed limit violation," while poor cumbersome Italian must use five.)

So, what do you think this speeding ticket for 24 km (15 miles) per hour over the speed limit in the concise canton of Graubünden will cost the Swiss Mr. and me?